I’ve always felt incredibly connected to animals and desperately wanted my own ‘spirit animal.’ I checked out countless books from the library on the subject and have done many meditations, waiting patiently for the right animal to reveal itself to me. I have waited in the misty Nothing, anxious for the fog to clear to see the animal there.
I think of all the animals I have a strong affinity towards: dogs, wolves, foxes, deer, even shaggy highland cows and goats. Elk. Moose. Predominately North American animals that are familiar, cute and comforting.. and I long thought that the Stag, even the legendary White Stag, could be my spirit animal. I have learned that it was all forced and wishful thinking.
Just now I was sitting on my porch and thinking about how lovely the birds were when it hit me.
When I revisit all of the Places in my life and I draw them out in my Memory Palace, I often include the sounds of the birds to round out the picture and breathe life into it. In my childhood home there were Mourning Doves and Owls. I remember holding the remains of a hatched Robin’s egg, brilliantly turquoise and fragile, in my hands, just outside the front door. The unmistakable call of the Whippoorwills in the backyard. At our cabin, at aptly named Lake Thunderbird, the majestic Cranes and Egrets that greeted us in the swamps along the highway. There were Bluejays there, too, and they were special. Oh, and how could I forget the Ostrich farm!! You get the point. Each important Place that has shaped me includes a vivid memory of a specific bird.
Each day when I sit on our porch (and I am not kidding when I say I am so blessed to live in this suburban wildlife paradise) I watch the birds in awe and I try to name all the ones I see: Robin, Sparrow, Blackbird, Goose, Duck, Cardinal, Red-winged Blackbird, Canary, Woodpecker, Seagull, even a Parrot once that got loose. Then there are the special ones: the Cormorants (or Water Turkeys, as I call them), hunting in the water in groups, with dangerous cool kid vibes. Beautiful white Egrets in yoga poses… The ancient Great Blue Heron that demands attention and respect… and lastly, we circle back again to the Bluejay.
There is something about the Bluejay that speaks to me and I know now that this little bird, small but lovely, is mine.
A quick Google search can tell me that the Bluejay, as a totem, symbolizes curiosity, vigilance, assertiveness, intelligence. The Bluejay values truth and clarity. They are not social creatures but they are loud, and resonate with the throat chakra and communication. The Bluejay says “It’s okay to be unpopular. Make your voice heard. Stand proud.”
This clearly needs some more reflection, as Google cannot make revelations for me… but I wanted to document it while I was stewing it over.
Until later.
Margot Velvet 