Last time I sat down to write here, I was welcoming eclipse season. I was desperate for change, and boy, did I get it. The last month has been … revealing. I’ve experienced great loss and tumbled into a sticky depression.
My sweet Maddie passed away on May 18th. She was 21 and a half. She was the oldest dog I’ve ever known.
The grief feels unbearable at times. She told us she was ready and we honored her and gave her a dignified death. She was in pain for a long time (kidney disease, arthritis and dementia), but we were able to control it with all sorts of treatments and adjustments and kept her happy and pain-free until it just became too much for her little old body. And so we said our goodbyes and cried hysterically in the parking lot at the ER vet afterward. It happened so fast; I’ve never had to put a dog down before. It was surreal and felt so very … sick. Not sick. There is a better word… profane?
And now, we who were three are just two. The world has opened up to us since we no longer have to stay home with her. We can go places together. We can travel, spend the night out, do simple things like shop together or go out to dinner, all which are very new to us despite being together for 16 years.
16 years we spent at home, our lives revolving around loving this little furry muppet. Suddenly, the world is huge and there are so many opportunities to live differently. I keep thinking: “At what cost?” And I honor that thought and just try to move through it with grace.
So here I am, starting Again-again.
We also experienced another great loss in the family, but I will not go into those details.
In the wake (pun intended?) of all this loss and grief, I have come to the realization that I need to help people. I want to help others. My soul is being called, there is a stirring within, a deep yearning to go the way of the Wild Woman.
In my previous career, I spent all day helping people feel better and allowing them to see their beauty. In my current career, I stare at numbers and logs and decode patterns and help other businesses. I love the security of this path but the work is hollow.
So with all this dis-ease and upheaval, I have decided that I will continue my professional path but also branch out into a more actualized version of my helper-self.
I am going to attend TheosoFest this year for the first time as Margot Velvet (formerly Twin Sight) and offer tarot readings and grounded guidance.
I am not a psychic or a guru—I am a warm-hearted intuitive who wants to create space for others to reflect, explore, and feel seen.
I’d like to start by offering readings by donation. More info soon. Thanks for being here.
❤️
MV
Margot Velvet 